What Inspires Me: Style, Psychology & Your Inner Team: Dressing From the Inside Out

Here’s a secret: I grew up with a therapist mom.

While other kids were learning their ABCs, I was learning about feelings, mindset, and why we do what we do. (Don’t worry, I still got my Saturday cartoons in.)

Watching how the way we think shapes the way we live eventually led me to become a life coach, continuing that legacy in my own way.

What amazes me most is how much this connects to style. Because style doesn’t really start when you open your closet doors. It starts in your mind.

It starts with how you see yourself, how you talk to yourself, and how you feel when you get dressed. It’s why you might find yourself stuck in the same “safe” clothes, why shopping can feel overwhelming, or why your wardrobe doesn’t reflect who you truly are.

When you change how you see yourself, your style follows.

I want to share a framework that can transform the way you think about getting dressed: Transactional Analysis, developed by Eric Berne. It teaches us that we each have an inner team influencing our choices, whether we realize it or not:

The Inner Child
Your emotional core, full of creativity, joy, and a longing to be seen—but also carrying fears and insecurities. This part wants to play with style, experiment, and express who you are but can hold back out of fear of judgment.

The Inner Parent
The voice of rules, expectations, and “shoulds” you’ve picked up from family and society. It’s the part that says “you can’t wear that” or “dress your age.” Sometimes it protects you, but it can also keep you small.

The Inner Adult
Your conscious, present self who can make choices aligned with who you are now. This part mediates between your Inner Child’s desires and your Inner Parent’s rules, allowing you to choose with intention and clarity.

Understanding these parts of yourself can transform your style journey from something stressful into something playful, intentional, and empowering.

Because when your style aligns with your true self, it’s not just about looking good. It’s about feeling like you.

In this short video, I’ll unpack this further and share three ways to let your Inner Child shine.

Which part of your inner team has been choosing your outfits lately?